Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: “asl” is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
You: You see a beaver in the distance lumbering towards you, a menacing glare on its face. You are armed with duct tape, a balloon, a spare set of shoes, and nailclippers. What do you do?
Stranger: Give me a moment, Sir or Ma’am.
Stranger: This is a pondersom question!
You: The beaver is getting closer with each passing second, but luckily it appears to have a broken foot
You: This slows it down somewhat
Stranger: First! I remove the shoeleaces from the shoes.
Stranger: Then I proceed to throw the lace-less shoes at the beaver, one by one, to distract it
Stranger: Next, I use the laces and duct tape to attach the balloon to my head.
You: The beavier is angrier and more determined to attack
Stranger: As it is a good sized balloon with helium, the loss of weight of the extra shoes lifts me off of the ground.
You: The beaver jump at your rising figure, snapping at your toes, but luckily you are high enough to avoid its rabid attack
You: Now you are rising above the treeline, still with nailclippers and ducttape
You: You will continue to rise unless you figure out a way to get back to land
You: the wind picks up and blows you eastward, towards what looks like a wooden hut
Stranger: I use the nail clippers to snip the balloon string. I fall on the roof.
You: You land on the roof, which then cracks and sends you falling into the shack below. You are not badly injured.
You: The shack appears to be abandoned. You are in a small dusty room.
You: There is a door to your left, and a peice of paper next to your feet
Stranger: I pick up the paper to read it.
You: It appears to be a faded map, with one corner missing. It may lead to treasure.
You: It is too dark to make out much more.
Stranger: I moved to where the hole in the ceiling is, to let in some light on the map.
You: You see a crude drawing of a house, presumably the shack you are in. A dotted line rises north, across what may be a river, and then turns sharply east where a thick black X is revealed.
You: The door is still to your left, and you are armed with duct tape, nai clippers, and a ragged balloon is still strapped to your head. You also have the map.
You: You hear some thumps at the door
You: Then a scraping sound
You: After a few minutes you realise that it is the beaver, trying to eat through the door.
Stranger: I look around to see if there are any other doors that lead outside.
You: There is a boarded up window to your right, and a pile of scraps directly below it.
You: The scrap pile is covered in dust, so it is difficult to discern what exactly is in the pile.
Stranger: I kick aside the scraps to reveal what is underneath.
You: You get a splinter in your ankle.
You: Underneath, you see a crowbar, a lighter, and some rusty bent nails
Stranger: pick up the crowbar and the lighter, and pry open the boarded up window,
You: Piece by piece, you pry the boards away. Sunlight trickles through a cracked window.
You: The gnawing noises at the door are getting louder and more insistent
You: The window is now free of boards.
Stranger: I jump out the window and take off running.
You: You jump at the window, and realise the glass was still there. Ouch. Because it was cracked, it shatters and you are left bleeding.
You: You make it through the window and limp hurridly away from the shack. The sun is beginning to set
You: You still are grasping the map in one hand, and the crowbar in the other.
Stranger: I check to make sure the nail clippers are still in my pocket, and the duck tape and string in my hair
You: All items are acocunted for.
You: In your pocket with the nail clippers
You: You look around and find yourself in a clearing. You hear water rushing in the distance.
You: Behind you, you hear faint angry squealing noises. The beaver must have finally eaten its way through the door, only to find you had escaped
You: It is angrier than ever and determined to hunt you down
You: It is a rare known fact that beavers, particularly rabid ones, have a very keen sense of smell.
You: After some sniffing around, the beaver finds your scent and starts hobbling angrily in your direction
You: You are starting to gather dust.
You: The beaver is now very close, and it smells your blood. It hungers.
Stranger: (sorry, vanished)
Stranger: I turn around and hold the crowbar like a baseball bat, ready to defend myself.
You: The beaver leaps at you, squealing as though it were possessed
Stranger: I swing the crowbar, aiming for its head
You: Roll to determine outcome of crowbar swing? Y/N
You: You swing at the beaver’s head and connect. Not hard enough to kill it, but the creature is momentarily stunned
You: You run towards the sound of rushing water, remembering that there may be some special treasure if you follow the map
You: You eventually reach a river, which is rushing pretty rapidly. It is narrow but deep.
You: The beaver has regained control and is limping towards you, making a strange screeching noise
Stranger: I do not dive in, for beavers are slow on land but fast in the water. I run down the bank, looking for a way to cross the river.
You: You run eastwards along the bank, and soon come across a delapitated wonden bridge. It looks like it could fall apart at any minute.
You: However, for now it still stands.
Stranger: I attempt to inflate the balloon again
You: The balloon has a small hole in it.
You: All the helium has escaped
You: The beaver is once again gaining on you
You: It is excited by the prospect of killing you. It would be able to feed its family a feast like never before!
You: Typically this beaver eats smaller creatures. It is a carnivore beaver. However, driven by hunger and sickness, it is determined to land a great meal.
Stranger: I make a daring leap across the bridge, praying that light feet will prevent it from breaking.
You: You land halfway across the bridge on a semi-sturdy plank of wood. There are large gaps where the wood has rotted away. Contiunuing with your momentum, a second leap takes you to the end of the bridge
You: You foot falls through, but the rest of your body tumbles forward onto land
You: Your ankle is twisted and cut, but still usable.
Stranger: I hobble up, using the crowbar, and continue running.
You: You consult the map and realise you must be close to the treasure.
You: You run eastward a bit farther when you stumble over a shovel
You: Behind you, the beaver contemplates the bridge in a rare act of brains over brawn
You: The shovel is laying over what appears to be a fresh mound of dirt,
Stranger: Sir or Miss Stranger?
Stranger: You have led me on a thrilling quest, but I am afraid that I must remove myself from this website. I have homework I must complete, and bed to attend to.
Stranger: I thank you greatly for the adventure you provided. It was most entertaining!
Stranger: I find myself unable to get up, even to use the shovel
You: very well. The ending was that you found an arsenal of weapons such as a flamethrower, shotguns, etc with which to kill the beaver. Success!
You: Thanks for playing along :)
Stranger: Do you find many who are willing to play?
You: Good luck with your homework :D Take care and don’t dream of beavers. Ciao!
